Steak or Breast Milk?

Public breastfeeding has become quite a hefty subject lately with opinions on both ends pushing well into the extreme.

While some feel that breastfeeding should be done in private, others think nothing of whipping the breast out whenever and wherever their baby demands it. This has understandably become a very tender, debatable topic.

I, for one feel that a breastfeeding baby has just as much right to eat in, let’s say, a restaurant as any other customer.

Why would it be okay for grown-ups, toddlers and even bottle-fed babies to eat in restaurants, but breastfed babies are excluded from this list? That while the mother already has a hard enough time trying to give her baby the best she possibly can by breastfeeding, without being made to feel like a criminal for doing so.

Nobody is forced to watch another eat and I personally feel watching someone chew with their mouth open is much worse than seeing a nursing baby.

When asking around it seemed that more women, mothers non the less, feel offended by seeing another breastfeed than men do. They feel it has to do with self respect and respect for others and that their husbands wouldn’t want to look at another woman’s breast while trying to chew down his steak. However, when asking the husbands (not in the wives’ presence of course) they seem to not be bothered by it. One actually said “You have to realize a boob is more than a toy, someone’s health & growth depends on what comes out of it.” Smart man. 

Some feel that they don’t have a problem with a mother nursing in public as long as they cover up. Now I used to feel the exact same way until my son was born in 2012. Although I was always well prepared with enough pumped milk and extras just in case, it has happened that he caught me off guard and I was forced to go feed in the car and heaven forbid…a bathroom. While sitting on that closed toilet seat, feeding my infant, I realized what I was doing. I was forcing my child to eat his lunch in a bathroom, a place where I would later tell him to not touch anything, because it is filthy! He deserved more than that. I respect myself as a mother and him as a human being too much to ever do that again. I feel the same way about covering up his face while he’s nursing, as to say that what he’s doing is wrong and embarrassing and has to be hidden. A breastfeeding mom said on Facebook that if you feel uncomfortable watching her baby eat, you’re welcome to collect a blanket from her to put over your face while you enjoy the rest of your meal. I agree 100%, he has just as much right to look around while nursing that you have while eating.

I made a suggestion on the La Leche League South Africa Facebook page, that perhaps “family oriented” restaurants should consider creating a “Breastfeeding Section” same as they have a “Smoking Section”. Not a little room where you’ll have to spend 15-40 minutes nursing, while the rest of your table enjoys their meal, but a section where breastfeeding moms and their families can enjoy their meals together – all of the family, including the baby that doesn’t order off the menu yet.

This received a very mixed reaction, while some thought it was a great idea, others feel that this suppresses breastfeeding even more. That breastfeeding should be normalized and everyone should learn to live with and actually appreciate it.

It was great to see moms have such passion about doing what is right for their children instead of caring what the world has to say about it.

I think we still have a long way to go in terms of breastfeeding in public, but I believe if we can get everyone to understand the importance thereof, perhaps they’ll be able to tolerate it to the point where they can actually appreciate it and applaud the mother for not giving up.

I might be more than a mom, but I am still a mother.

How do you feel about this? Leave us a comment below.

If you are a breastfeeding mother in need of some information, support or if you'd just like to chat to other moms in the same boat, here are some helpful websites and chat groups.

For information and support La Leche League SA

Chat to other moms on https://www.facebook.com/lalecheleaguesouthafrica/

For motivation and chats: https://www.facebook.com/bfmamatalk/

For motivation and chats: https://www.facebook.com/Breastfeedsouthafrica/